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"JPM Omen 2.0" Sparks Stock Pump'n'Dump After Crude Surges'n'Purges

In the paraphrased words of JPMorgan's head quant, "We're halfway there" for the selling... and yes it appears "we are living on a [Fed/PBOC/ECB/BOJ] prayer"

But...the message from the mainstream media remains the same...

 

Everything trades on fun-durr-mentals... Spot The Difference!

 

Volume was terrible...

 

And once again they messed with VIX to ensure a green close for the S&P...

 

Here's your stock market today... in the words of one wizened trader "gamma bitches!"

 

Cash indices closed mixed with Small Caps and Nasdaq red...

 

And while Trannies briefly got into the green for the week, it did not last...

 

Some context for the bounce... The Dow is back at 50% of the loss...

 

Once again VIX was battered lower into the close - because why wouldn't you sell vol into tomorrow's cliffhanger payrolls print!!??

 

 

Once again credit markets moved lower first - leading stocks...

 

Treasury yields dropped on Draghi's QE promise then spiked along with stocks early on (30Y up to 2.98%) but bonds were quickly bid after that and closed modestly lower (note the steepening holding into tomorrow's payroll print)

 

The Dollar jumped as Draghi's QE promise sunk the EUR. USDJPY was unable to hold up its 120 tractor beam...(Note SEK roundtripped against the USD despite its actions)

 

Commodities were mixed but silver crude and copper all ramped early on.. only to giove it all back later...

 

Another day in paradise for crude traders as yesterday's purge-n-surge becomes today's surge-n-purge...

 

Charts: Bloomberg

Bonus Chart: About those nasty Chinese devaluers??