Anthony Alfidi
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Anthony Alfidi in Founder and CEO, Alfidi Capital,

Financial Sarcasm Roundup for 02/03/16

Groundhog Day came and went without any animals feeling Jungian existential angst. Climate change has more impact than a rodent's shadow on winter's length.

The ECB lowers expectations for more monetary stimulus. It could mean anything, or nothing. The ECB now mimics the Fed as it discovers it has the ability to move stock markets and resolve bad banks' balance sheets. Central banks don't make policy errors anymore. They send "layer cake" messages in a bifurcated economy. Retail investors will hear something about selling bonds that may have peaked in value. European bond fund managers will hear something about not expecting support for their asset valuations. Crying then begins in earnest in bond fund boardrooms.

The UK must wonder if the BOE plans for negative interest rates. "I say, Jeeves, is that a minus sign in your savings account? Why yes, it is indeed, old bean. Good God, man, such poppycock used to be confined to less dignified countries like our former colonies. Oh, fiddlesticks. This calls for a shot of brandy." BTW folks, anyone who wants to pull another George Soros move and attack the British pound should watch how far the BOE tries to push this NIRP speculation.

China will keep cutting banks' reserve ratios. It's just like getting a haircut every month until you're forced to go bald, and then the barber scalps you. Forget about responsible bank stewardship. That just flew out the window in a desperate search for capital to prop up China's failing stock and property markets. I guess Beijing couldn't entice enough Western banks to launch onshore yuan trading branches. There are plenty of suckers in both the West and China who will try to catch falling knives behind a bamboo curtain.

Your average groundhog does not follow the financial markets as closely as I do. That's another bragging point for Alfidi Capital.