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So You Want To Be A Modern "Trader": Here Are The Requirements

Igor Oystracher's 3Red trading firm may not exist much longer after the recent vicious crackdown against the company's spoofing practices profiled a month ago in "Russian College Dropout Busted For 1,316 Spoofs Of Everything From E-Minis, To Copper, To VIX", an assault orchestrated by none other than king of HFT market-manipulation, Citadel itself, but for now he is busy looking for new trader meat.... ideally with pimples.

Back in 2010 we predicted that as a result of the advent of HFTs as the most profitable form of market manipulation on Wall Street, old school rolodex-and-phone, carbon-based traders were a dying breed and on their way out. Little did we know just how accurate we would be.

Below is a "help wanted" ad for a "trader" by none other than the abovementioned 3Red spoofers.  We put trader in quotation marks because... well, just read the ad and you will see.

Here are the required skills you must have to be a successful "trader" in the new normal. For all those who satisfy the requirements, best of luck and may the best man (or vacuum tube) win, preferably in less time than it takes to frontrun a Bank of Japan E-mini "buy" order.